I AM ENOUGH

THINGS TO DO...be enough.  And I am! 

How?  Definitely not on my account, self-confidence or assurance of who I am.  Most assuredly through Jesus Christ! 

Things that tug on my heart and circumstances that I am forging through, I have always reached for the nearest scrap of paper that I can find to jot down things that I truly feel that the Lord needs for me to see...learn...and remember.  I usually stuff it away in my 'smash book' of collected notes of scripture, thoughts, promises and encouragement.  This said note gracefully floated from beneath the collection of notes the other day as I picked up my binder to put it in its rightful spot.  I had written this just this past fall.  Something I've been trying to learn to be.  It just so happened to be on a "To Do" list.  Ironic?  Maybe.  I believe it was with great cause that I unknowingly at the time wrote it on this paper.  It is a wonderful reminder for what needs to be done.  Being enough.

We live in a world that flashes in our faces with mega-phones screaming in our heads that we are NOT ENOUGH!  Not thin enough, pretty enough, tall enough, popular enough, rich enough, cool enough, fun enough, ______ enough...etc!  Of course, the world around us seems to offer such marvelous solutions for said problems--for a price...something that will literally cost us and often times it isn't only monetary.

I, on my own, am not enough.  No matter how hard I try, I just will not be enough because there will always be something bigger, something better, something more that grabs hold of me and tries to get me to measure up.  Measure up to what or to whom, I'm not quite sure but I do know that I will never, on my own, feel as if I am enough according to this world.  I just don't have the strength, skills, mind-set or endurance to do so.   I have spent far too much time and energy focusing on what 'others' think...would think...what their opinions would be...how I looked physically as well as in social standing.  This was a HUGE waste of my time.  I asked myself just who was I so concerned about.  Who were the 'others?'  Who were 'they?'  My focus was far too much narrowed and concentrated on things that can waste away.

For about six months now, the Lord has really been tugging at my heart and ministering to me about being enough in Him.  What this means is that even though I am not enough on my own I can fully rest assured that I am completely enough through Jesus Christ because He is more than enough.  And because He resides within me it is His strength and all that He is that makes me enough.  He is the One whom I need to place my focus and spend my time with.

This sounds simple enough, yet it was extremely challenging in my application.  I would verbally whisper time and time again these three simple yet powerful words to serve as a reminder..."I AM ENOUGH.  I AM ENOUGH.  I AM ENOUGH!"    The more I would speak these words the more God changed my focus.  Instead of being so concerned with what 'others' thought, I began focusing on God and glorifying Him.  I realized that the more I did this the more freeing and peaceful I felt.  Don't get me wrong, I didn't snub my noise to everyone and everything around...I'm human and I tend to be concerned with how I look in appearance, and getting caught up with  my "I wished..." statements that would only benefit me.  I did, however, learn to not let it be my primary focus and concern. I sought God and relied on Him each new day.  I slowly began to realize that all that I wished for were for things that were either highly unrealistic or required much from me that I just didn't have. I began asking myself some important questions like, ' What was I doing things for and for whom were I doing them?  Why?  What was I pursuing and for what reason?  Who was I looking to in order to be recognized?  Why am I so concerned of others' approval?'

It appeared to me that I was far too consumed with what 'this world' thought.  I fell into the mold of what the world thought was 'good...flawless...desirable...and so on.'  Things that bothered me much was slowly bothering less. For example, my body, self-image.  For as long as I can remember I was never fully satisfied or happy with how I looked.  For years, I invested in this and that diet product, joined various gyms, purchased countless 'magical' beauty products.  There were moments that I got the desired outcome but then something else (whatever it may be at that given moment to distract from where I was) came along and I was unhappy again.  The lovely looking glass in my bathroom would faithfully remind me each and every morning that I needed work done and lots of it.  I would tell that looking glass just what I thought needed to be done in order for me to be happy.  I spoke as if it actually could do something about my complaints.  This is something that I am not at all proud of doing and I have to admit I still catch myself speaking to that looking glass as if it were a long lost friend. That's when I speak to Christy and speak Truth of who I am and whose I am. 

A good friend of mine gave me something to read that contained this amazing story.  It's called 'The Sculptor.'  I wished I knew who wrote this lovely story because I'd like to thank them!  Let me tell you, this helped me do a complete turn around on how I viewed myself.  Take a look...

In front of me sits a brick of clay.  Not just any old clay.  The best clay available anywhere.  It cost me a lot, but it's worth it.

I know exactly what I want to sculpt.  I've got this mental picture of a beautiful girl.  She's vibrant.  She's perfect.  She's her.

I start by shaping her body.  I've given a lot of thought to how I want her to look.  What curves I want where.  How long I want her legs.  How her arms should hang.  The shape of her hips and breasts.  I have planned every single square inch of her.

Next I move to her face.  I'm extra careful here.  With every touch of My Hand, every swipe of My Palm, I create a face that takes My breath away.  Her eyes are deep, glowing, magnetic.  Her nose is amazing.  Her mouth is unlike all others.

Now onto her hair.  I won't stop until I get it just right.  Just the right texture, body and color.  She'll probably complain, but the truth is that I've never created any better than her.

She's My Masterpiece!

OK, you might have guessed it by now, but this is no ordinary sculptor.  He's the most well-known sculptor in all of history.  And many think He does the best work.  His name?  God.

And you are His project...His masterpiece.  He has NEVER created anyone who is more beautiful that YOU!  He's the Perfect Artist, and you are His result.

Unlike every other artist, He never makes a mistake.  He never has to start over.  He had in mind what you were going to look like when He created you in your mom's womb, and you've come out just right!

"Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out:  You formed me in my mother's womb.  I thank You, High God--You're breathtaking!  Body and soul, I am marvelously made!  I worship in adoration--what a creation!  You know me inside and out.  You know every bone in my body:  You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit.  How I was sculpted from nothing into something."  Psalm 139:13-15 MSG

After reading this and letting it penetrate my soul, I became mindful to fix my eyes more on God in this area of my life.  It's important to be aware of the way we set our minds because we will begin to behave and act in that way.  That's why it's vital to set our mind on God and His Word. "For as he thinks in his heart, so is he." Proverbs 23:7a AMP   When we intentionally change our focus to God things change for the better...God becomes much clearer to us.  Our minds are then filled with the Word of Christ and the things of the world doesn't have much influence.  My body is not very good, flawless or desirable according to this world but I have to say that I believe that I am excellent, unique and quite vintage...extraordinarily one-of-a-kind!! 

We've all heard of these sayings, "There's always something to be thankful for," and "It could be worse."  I think we tend to say these to help us feel better for the moment, but we need to truly believe them because they're true.  I'm thankful that I have a functioning body that enables me to get around.  Thankful that I have limbs that get me to where I need to go and do what I need to do.  Thankful for my sight...hearing...the ability to speak.  Thankful for so much more!  I will continue to work on keeping my body maintained in a healthy state but to be realistic about it.  I'm not going to grow to a luxurious 5'7" stance when I know that this body is only temporary and in all reality I've shrunk to a glorious 5'1" and embracing it to its fullest! I am ever so thankful that I am able to stand tall no matter what measurement is documented. 

It has never been God's intention for you to be enough on your own because He is ENOUGH!  Christ makes me enough!  Christ makes you enough!  You in yourself are not enough...You in Christ Jesus will be enough because is He is ENOUGH!!  "We are hedged in (pressed) on every side [troubled and oppressed in every way], but not cramped or crushed; we suffer embarrassments and are perplexed and unable to find a way out, but not driven to despair; We are pursued (persecuted and hard driven), but not deserted [to stand alone}; we are struck down to the ground, but never struck out and destroyed; Always carrying about in the body the liability and exposure to the same putting to death that the Lord Jesus suffered, so that the [resurrection] life of Jesus also may be shown forth by and in our bodies." 2 Corinthians 4:8-10 AMP

I've decided to place my value in God.  To glorify God in all that I do.  Being enough in Christ means that even though I may be struggling on any particular day, I can stand tall with complete confidence that He loves me, accepts me and calls me His own.  I am His Masterpiece.  His Creation.  His Fingerprints are all over me and that is very, very good!  So with jiggly arms, muffin top, thunder thighs, double chin and much wrinkles here and there I can boldly and confidently say, "I AM ENOUGH!"  and truly believe it!  I am the daughter of a King that is not moved by this world.  For my God is with me and goes before me...I do not fear or fret or waste my time in front of my looking glass because I AM HIS!!  And for this reason alone, I celebrate and rejoice!

When you believe that God, the Sculptor and Creator of you, is ENOUGH you will begin to feel settled...come to rest... be clear...become fixed, resolved and established leaning toward peace as you trust God in all of His "ENOUGHNESS!"  "You will guard him and keep him in perfect and constant peace whose mind [both its inclination and its character] is stayed on You, because he commits himself to You, leans on You, and hopes confidently in You.  So trust in the Lord (commit yourself to Him, lean on Him, hope confidently in Him) forever; for the Lord God is an everlasting Rock [the Rock of Ages].  Isaiah 26:3-4 AMP

My friend, I encourage you to stand tall in Christ confidently moving forward knowing that you are a wonderful work of art, a true masterpiece that was perfectly created.  Be glad and rejoice in the Lord giving Him praise and glory for the work He has done and continues to do in you.  As we learn to be enough in Christ we can expect wonderous truths and promises that He speaks to us through His Word.  God's word is our Life Map.  Everything we need to know is in the B-I-B-L-E.  Commit to God and lean on Him waiting patiently as He does a brilliant work within you.  When you believe that you are enough through Christ then His Radiance is ever-more vibrant and radiates fantastically through you to the world around you.  "Commit your way to the Lord [roll and repose each care of your load on Him]; trust (lean on, rely on, and be confident) also in Him and He will bring it to pass.  And He will make your uprightness and right standing with God go forth as the light, and your justice and right as [the shining sun of] the noonday.  Be still and rest in the Lord; wait for Him and patiently lean yourself upon Him; fret not..." Psalm 37:5-7a AMP

My darling, YOU ARE ENOUGH!

Take care and be blessed,

Christy Krezman
Rosette Ministry

India in Review

It’s been several weeks now since I have returned from Calcutta, India.  I first want to extend my gratitude and appreciation for all of your prayers not only during the time of my trip but for the many months that lead up to it.  I would appreciate your continued prayers as God is still doing a work in my heart as to what this whole mission trip plus Christy will equal out to be. 

 

If I had a special bottle that I could capture all the sights, smells, sounds and stimulation overload constantly happening in Calcutta, I would have captured it especially for you all to fully grasp just exactly what life is like in this very large and busy place.  My very first experience in India was the driving!  Let me tell you something, I so did NOT understand their method of driving of no rules, no speed limit, not stop signs/lights, no specified lanes and the constant horn honking.  That was just the vehicles—cars, trucks, cabs, and many buses.  Motorbikes, bicycles, makeshift wheeled-things, other transporting things (no words for what they used!), pedestrians and yes, cows and goats in the midst of all the shuffling and hustle and bustle of traffic.  An experience in itself!!

 

Surprisingly, each day got easier and quite comfortable since we had the most excellent drivers.  When daylight shone upon this city and we were driving to our many destinations, we got to witness something that my eyes had never seen and my mind as well as my heart could not comprehend.  No defined curbs separated the road from the walkway and there were so many people…people that would be selling their many items on top of tarps just strewn upon the ground.  Next would be a make shift café of sorts made from scraps (wood, rocks, bricks, tarp, boxes, whatever could be found and could be used.) A fire would be the heat source and the food, tea would be prepared there as patrons would gather around.  Just a ways down from that would be a mother with her children bundled up in whatever linens she had found trying to lay as comfortably as possible to get rest.  Next to her were several children with what appeared to be a grandfather bathing one of his grandsons in the gutter with runoff water that must have streamed down from the café. The little guy lathered up with soapy suds and being rinsed off with gutter water using a small metal bowl.  Just around the corner from them were two large cows grazing through the pile of garbage that is just thrown into a pile only to be burned later.  Make-shift housing all around, laundry from the homeless strewn about wherever you looked, living wherever possible.  People coming and going.  Scurrying here and there.  We come to a stop –traffic cop trying to direct traffic and all of a sudden on my window a hand appears tapping three times onto my window.  Not knowing where the hand came from I looked out my window only to find a young adult male that looked very deformed and disabled just sitting literally in the midst of all this traffic only inches away from vehicles on either side of him.  His eyes met mine and I saw such despair and helplessness.  I have to admit I was very startled and not sure what to do.  Not having anything that I could give him, I leaned back brokenhearted and began weeping.  He then gently placed his entire hand flat upon the window and rested it there for the rest of the time we waited—which ended up being close to 10 minutes.  I began praying for him, feeling such sadness and a horrible pain in my heart.  We finally began to drive off and slowly his hand slipped off the window.  I had heard about the homeless and beggars but I had not personally experienced something so heartbreaking.  I felt like he was invisible.  Cars, people just passed him by as if he didn’t exist.  He was right in the middle of the busy street and people deliberately avoided him like he was an obstacle.  I didn’t get it.  I had a whole host of emotions that I offered up to God. 

 

God was wonderful in dealing with me.  Not giving me answers to my “Why?” but to remind me that PEOPLE MATTER! Every single person…PEOPLE MATTER!  I, too in my everyday life, had gotten in a visual perspective of only seeing things that I only wanted to see and if that meant turning a blind eye to people on the street corners with signs asking for help then I did only choosing when I wanted to “see” them and then I would continue doing my own thing.  God sees everyone and loves each one the same.  Seeing doesn’t always have to be done with my eyes…sometimes it is very important to see with the eyes of my heart.  I had asked God to break my heart for what breaks His and I believe He did just that.

 

 

 

 

 

 

At the PEACE Centers, where I spoke and worked with various women (some men, too!) was a most amazing experience like no other.  There were several places that we went to, but it was the PEACE Center in Bauria that I had the opportunity to connect with the women who were tailoring students there.  I first spoke Sunday morning at church which was awesome. It was a packed house.  Sitting on the floor…down the hall—both directions, and people standing outside listening through the windows.  Amazing!!  The next day, I had the pleasure of speaking to the students directly.  Their faces were so precious.  They all had looks of desperation and much eagerness to soak up whatever I had to share. 

 

I started off by asking them where their fabric scraps would be.  With a bit of confusion they went to look for some and gathered some from the trash.  I took the material that they brought to me telling them that the world would just toss this aside…discarding it, not seeing any purpose or use for it.  They may even step on it, make it feel useless and treat it as if it were nothing worthy.  We, like the material, can very much feel the same way.  Believing what others say about us, how they treat us, the situations that we go through tossing us here and there—we begin to believe that we are unworthy, useless, unhopeful, and no purpose to fulfil.  But our Heavenly Father does not waste anything…He does not discard or throw away.  He takes things that the world meant for this and turns them into something quite beautiful through life’s journies.  I took that piece of fabric scrap, roughly cut out four pieces (because life can be quite rough on us) and I began demonstrating the process of the Rosette.  How God holds each petal which represents our season in His Hand.  Nothing can snatch us out of His Hand.  Even when we are put to the flame of life to be shaped, molded, contained in everyday living as well as those times of extreme heat of walking in the flame…we are still in His Hands.  I continued this process four times.  I explained to them that God loved each of us so much that He sent His only son, Jesus, to die on the Cross so that we may have eternal life.  We must keep God the center of lives, which the button in the Rosette represents.  I held that Rosette up pointing out the singe marks that represents our dark times, times of struggles, times that we want to hide or are shameful about, but it is when the layers of the petals that God puts together those very spots that we try to hide create the uniqueness and beauty of the Rosette.  It is a Materpiece…one of a kind!  Their faces spoke very loudly…AMAZING!! I explained to these wonderful ladies that they were not an accident, that they were created on purpose and for a purpose!  God has a life story that He is writing specifically for each of their lives and they are living it.  They got it!!

 

I wasn’t finished yet.  I explained that God does not waste anything.  The lefteover fabric scrap that I had used I took and made strips and began making fabric twine  which can be made into a basket, bowl, bag, mat, etc…the possiblities are endless!!  I explained that like the material as it is being twisted and turned and pulled together it is becoming very strong and united, unable to come apart.  It is strengthened by this process.  God does this with us as well.  The process is not always pleasant and comfortable, we question and wonder why we must go through things, but in the end a beautiful creation is displayed.  God’s Masterpiece!  I told them that they are His treasure…that He delights in and sings over them…they are precious to them.  By now, they are visibly happy, faces smiling from ear to ear and very eager to begin making these Rosettes and fabric twine.  They took to it quickly.  Understood it wonderfully. 

 

 

 

The next day I returned to women sitting and working on Rosette making and fabric twine making.  I had this day slotted to work more with them to help them master this skill but God had better plans.  He allowed me the privilege to hear each of their testimony.  One by one, each woman stood and spoke in their native language, Bengali, and shared their story.  Just about each and every one of them were very thankful for the PEACE Center and the help of learning tailoring.  Many thanked me for coming and teaching them this new skill.  Some shared what they hoped  their future would hold.  But there was one lovely woman who when I first met her held her head low, would not look at me in the eyes, and just had a sad, sad look upon her.  She stood and spoke for quite some time.  Through the interpretor she shared that she was a Muslim women with four children.  Her husband tortures her (emotional abuse and withholds food.)  She was sent to this tailoring school to help provide for her family but she stated that she has a hard time learning and understanding things…this included the tailoring.  It was when I was speaking about the Rosette and fabric twine that something within her clicked.  She understood…the making of the items but more importantly the story behind them.  She said that this is something that she could do.  She then came up to me and gave me a miniature version of a fabric twine basket with a Rosette on it plus she gave me a beautiful flower that she herself created all her own out of the fabric scraps.  She presented it to me with a giant smile and looked me in the eye embracing me!  Such joy!  I was later told that she had gone home the night before and made many more Rosettes and had already got  many in their village wearing them!  God is so GOOD!

 

These are just some of the lovely Rosettes that the tailoring students blessed upon my head!

I really wish that I could take the time to sit down with each and every one of you.  There was so much that I experienced and had the privilege of witnessing that I would quite possibly have to write a book.  Just know that God did a beautiful work in and through me.  I was blessed by wonderful, amazing, obedient Christians who inspired me and helped me put things in proper perspective.   There is beautiful and amazing things happening in India, however, there is very, very much more work to be done there.  Your prayers for India and the people of India is greatly needed.  There are very few Christians in India doing amazing work for God.  God is blessing them and guiding them, but honestly I don’t know how they don’t allow discouragement keep them from moving forward.  There are many obstacles and hindrances that prevent even speaking the Name of Jesus.  But God is good and His people are faithful!  My prayers will include India and those who live there doing God’s work as well as what direction God is leading me now that He had me see with my heart and not my eyes. 

 

May you be blessed!!

 

Thank you again for your faithful prayers!

 

Christy Krezman

 

“The Lord your God wins victory after victory and is always with you.  He celebrates and sings because of you, and He will refresh your life with His love.”  Zephaniah 3:17 CEV